15 irrational things that make every Irish mammy spiral

We have all experienced unwanted rants about the most outrageous things. From leaving the immersion on to standing in front of the microwave, Irish mammies really do have irrational fears.

Here are just 15 of the most basic things that make every Irish mammy spiral...

Wearing fake tan

Who convinced the Irish mammies that fake tan is bad for your health?

Nothing like the feeling of a fresh tan being ruined by your mother saying: "I heard that seeps into your blood, can't be good for you."

Turning the light on in the car

"Turn the light off fast before it causes the car in front of us to lose sight and crash into us."

As rational as this is, a crash is probably more likely to be caused by the full-beam headlights she doesn't know how to turn off... not that we'd dare suggest this to her!

A phone charging overnight

Every Irish mammy knows someone whose house burnt to ash thanks to an iPhone charger being plugged in overnight.

It's hard to differentiate what is the truth from what they've seen scrolling on Facebook

Their business being "put on Facebook"

Is it even possible for an Irish mammy to tell you a bit of gossip without them following it up with "don't go putting that on Facebook."

Why would I put that on Facebook? Who even uses Facebook anymore?

Sitting on a wall outside

"You'll get a kidney infection from sitting there, get up!"

We're pretty sure they learned this from the same medical school that taught them flat 7up cures everything.

Using the Lord's name in vain

Nothing will get you the belt of the wooden spoon faster than saying "Jesus Christ" or "Oh my God" in front of your Irish mammy. They stick up more for Jesus than they do their own children!

What the neighbors will think

The opinions of the neighbors seem to hold more value than gold to Irish mammies.

You don't even like Teresa, why do you care if she sees me bringing the bins out in my pyjamas?!

Wearing your coat indoors

"Take off your coat or you won't feel the benefit of it when you go outside".

It is honestly colder inside the house than it is outside, I think I'll be good.

Using the "good" room/plates/biscuits

Can someone please explain the logic behind the nicest room in the house only being used by guests who call once a year?! Why can't I eat a Viscount biscuit on a china plate when I'm feeling boujee?

Standing in front of the microwave

Who told Irish mammies that standing in front of the microwave will give you radiation poisoning? Do they really think that they would be in every household if they were that bad?

Leaving food on your plate

Nothing like feeling full during dinner but being forced to finish every last bite anyway.

"What about the starving kids in Africa." Good old guilt trip!

Leaving the house with wet hair

This one might have a bit of science to back it up, but there is no reason for Irish mammies to get so wound up by it.

"You'll catch your death," feels like a bit of an exaggeration when I go out with damp hair.

Leaving the immersion on

Asking for a friend, has anyone ever actually checked if leaving the immersion on does cause the electricity bill to skyrocket?

It is a mortal sin in Ireland to have your immersion on for one second longer than it has to be, your Irish mammy will launch a full FBI investigation to find out who left it on.

Watching too much TV

"Your eyes will go square". Interesting theory, can you show me someone this has happened to? Ah, you heard it on Facebook...

Wearing a mini skirt

God forbid you go out dressed like your peers, your Irish mammy will faint. Going out in a mini skirt is as bad as going out naked to them!

"You can't leave the house in that!"

* This article was originally published on Evoke.ie.