Here are some quick tips to help find Mr./Ms. wonderful...Open up your heart. Tell yourself everyday you're ready to love someone. Pray to find him/her. Smile 100 times a day. Look your best everyday this month. Get a make-over or spa treatment to relax and feel better about yourself. Make sure everyone you know "knows you're ready for a relationship." Lastly make sure you believe in your heart that YOU are a great catch! Notice that all the changes I suggested are coming from inside of you. We all have the power to change. Once you've mastered these changes, now you're ready to do something about it! If you like the idea of a professional doing the search for you especially if you're busy...Call me at 631-577-7940 to schedule your appointment. My favorite letter this week was from Mary 31 Dear MTN, I am very skeptical about meeting new people. Every time I turn on the news or read a newspaper all I hear are horror stories about all the crazy men that are out there looking for their next prey. I met a guy briefly at a singles event last week, and he asked me out on a date. I don't know anything about this guy other than he says he's 35. I really am afraid to meet a stranger. I asked him last week if he would be willing to meet me out with me and my girlfriend. His answer was no, he said it would be very awkward to get to know each other that way. Since that call, he hasn't called since. Really it's not a big deal, since I didn't feel comfortable meeting him anyway, but what is your opinion about what I said. Was it so out of line that it scared him away? Dear Mary, I completely understand your hesitancy, but men feel differently than we do. Men are not afraid to meet new people. Men don't have as much worries as we do with meeting people for the first time. It's usually the women that get hurt, more than the other way around. So in his eyes, he was looking forward to meeting and getting to know you, and you brought in the fact that not only would he have to impress you, he'd also be being judged by a third party - you're friend...who might be more critical than you. I personally think in this situation, it was just a little too much to ask a guy for the first meeting. But again, I do understand that you're nervous about meeting a guy you know nothing about. That's the whole premise of using my service, especially since I do background investigations on every client, so you never have to worry who you're meeting. But until you're ready for my program, there are some things you can do to safeguard yourself in the beginning of a new relationship. First of all, have at least 5 phone conversations with this guy. Unfortunately, your guard has to be up, until he proves to you, you can let it down...You have to look for those red flags...make sure every conversation is the same as the ones before. Look for consistency, and certainly be aware if he gives you different answers the next time you ask him the same question from a week ago. Once it's time to meet him, let all your friends know where you're going. Go to the restaurant and back home only...no exceptions, and keep your cell phone in your pocketbook. Go to the restaurant and check in about 15 minutes after meeting him to tell your family or friends if you're okay. Then have a great time. You're in a safe place, people know where you are, so just be yourself and let your guard down. I also suggest you give him a call and apologize for the last phone call. Just tell him you were nervous about meeting him and is he still interested in meeting you alone one night...Good luck and have fun! Quick letter from Joe, 28 Dear MTN, I met a girl who is great. She's beautiful, sexy, has a good job and would definitely be the person I would like to marry one day. I always wanted to get married when I turned 30. We've been going together for six months now and everytime I try to "have sex" with her she stops me. Finally last weekend I said, "what's up?" Six months is longer then I've ever waited for a girl. She told me she wants to wait until she or we get married. What is that about? At first I thought she was kidding, then I realized she was serious. I really can't wait 2 years, that's ridiculous. Is there any way I can get her to change or should I move on. Dear Joe, So many times when clients come into my office they tell me about a girl that got away because they did something stupid (no offense), or wasn't ready to get married etc. Do you want to be that guy in two years? You already said how great she is. If you think it's that easy to find such a great girl in this day and age who will "put out" for you, then dump her. But I have a feeling you'll always regret it...Ask yourself if you could see yourself marrying her in two years when you turn 30. If the answer is yes, start talking about getting engaged and married. Maybe once you're engaged, she'll trust you enough to make an exception. Just make sure first that she's the "one for you." If she is, she should be worth the wait for you! Please send in your questions to [email protected]. Maureen Tara Nelson Private Matchmaking, Inc. 1-888-31-MATCH