Hello again to all my single readers. Thank you all so much for all your great emails! It is really hard to select the ones for my column since they are all such great questions. Thank you also to the guys this week (Gary, Thomas, Phil and Peter) that sent me such nice emails thanking me, and all your kind words about the column. I am very happy you're enjoying it! Dear MTN, My name is Nick and I would like to know what women are looking for on a first date that would win them over for a second date. I'm 30 years old, considered good looking by most people, have a great job, so I've been told - but it seems even though I meet a lot of beautiful women and get them to go out with me on a first date, it never leads to a second date. I do all the usual things that guys are told to do, I use the three day rule before I call the girl after the date. When I call her, I tell her how much I enjoyed meeting her and how great the date was. But then once I say, "so when can I see you again?" it's all over! I've heard every excuse under the sun. They'll say they had fun but they think we would be better just as friends, or it was nice meeting me but they're just not ready to get serious right now, or my favorite, I just didn't feel the chemistry with you. Even though finding these girls doesn't cost a lot of money, since it's on the internet, these dinners are getting pretty expensive. I don't mind spending money on a girl, but I'm just getting sick of only having "one date" from it. So, what is it that they're looking for? -Nick Dear Nick, You bring up a lot of very interesting and important points about dating. To answer your first question, what women are looking for, I actually took a survey from some of my female clients to get you the best possible answer. Keep in mind however, my clients are girls that are seriously looking for a committed relationship, and most girls on the internet are not, so that might change the answer a bit. But we'll discuss that in a minute. The most important thing my clients are looking for in a guy on the first date is - how sincere he seems. Therefore, you might want to think about your last few dates and go over in your mind the conversations you had and ask yourself honestly if you feel you were being sincere. Most of the girls elaborated that finding a good looking guy is easy, it's more important that he be sincere. I also suggest you ask your friends if they think you come across as being sincere. Be prepared if they say no! And if that's the case, fix it! Another important point I must bring up is...guys please forget about that silly rule to wait three days to call a girl. All girls know it, so if you play that game, they know you're playing a game with them. If you are seriously looking to find the right girl, from now on, NO MORE GAMES. Call them the next day after the date and tell them how great it was. That alone might make a difference. One more point is what I mentioned earlier about some of the girls that use the internet. In most cases, they are seeing a few guys at once, and their focus is on finding the best "catch". In their eyes, it could be the guy who makes the most money...In my program, since the girls are all marriage minded, they are on a more serious level, and are more concerned with what's in a guys heart, rather than what's in his wallet. You might want to consider giving my office a call. I always say, if you are looking for fun and one night stands, do the internet. If you're looking for marriage, it's time to call me! Good Luck! Dear MTN, My name is James and I'm really 52, but I look about ten years younger. If a younger woman asks me my age, I usually say I'm 42. My reasoning is that I really want kids one day (soon), and obviously this is only possible with a younger woman. My friends that are girls think this is terrible that I do this. What do you think about me doing this? I really trust your opinion. And also, at what point should I tell her the truth? -James Dear James, James, James, James, I see your reasoning, but lying is never the right answer. Would you like to be dating a girl for about 6 months, and start thinking about getting married and having kids with her, and then find out she's not 35 like she told you, she's really 45! And to top it off, at 45 she doesn't want to have kids? Well, that's what you're doing... The good news is there are many men that are easily have kids at 52, so there is no reason for you to lie. Men have it much easier than woman when it comes to having children later on in life. My advice is to be proud of your age, and be honest right from the start when you meet a girl that you think might have the qualities you would want in a wife one day, that you are seriously looking for marriage and children with the right woman. This way, if the girl isn't seriously looking for that, hopefully she'll be honest and not waste any of your time. P.S. woman are having babies a lot later in life these days for many reasons, so you don't need to be stuck in the old mind set that women can only have kids in their 30's. Dear MTN, A new girl started working in my office and she's really attractive. We've gotten to know each other pretty well over the past two weeks and I really like her. I definitely want to ask her out. The problem is Valentine's Day is right around the corner. Do I ask her out now and have to worry about all the usual worries that come about when you're dating someone new for Valentine's Day, like what to get her? Is it too much? Is it too little? Or should I avoid all that and just wait until after Valentine's Day? -Pete Dear Pete, People put way too much emphasis on Valentine's Day. It's just a day! It should be viewed as a day of happiness if you're already in love with someone, or a day to let someone in your life that you love (a mother, grandmother, sister etc) simply know you are thinking about them - by giving them a nice box of chocolates or a nice card. To answer you're question, you should not waste any time and ask her out now. See how things go by Valentine's Day and celebrate it in an appropriate manner for someone whom you've only been dating for about a month. Taking her out to dinner would be a great idea. Waiting to ask her out is just plain silly. Did you even think about how you would feel if someone else asks her out now and you lose out? When it comes to Love, it's never a good idea to wait! I always say, GO FOR IT. Now my lecture on dating someone you work with...I know you didn't ask, but my advice on this topic is-it's never a good idea to date someone you work with. You need to think about the future and the possibility of what would happen if the relationship doesn't work out. You even need to first find out if your company allows dating the employees. The reason many employers are instituting such rules is due to the high amount of problems that occur if the relationship doesn't work out...Hope you don't mind the extra advice! But there are many more fish in the sea...As I've said before, going fishing somewhere else. Please email your Valentine's Day questions to [email protected]. Maureen Tara Nelson is a Private Matchmaker who specializes in singles who are marriage minded, or looking for a committed relationship. For more information, check out her website at Mtnmatchmaking.com. To schedule a free consultation with Maureen personally, call 1-888-31-MATCH.