Dear MTN, My name is Edward and I was planning to ask my girlfriend to get married to me on St. Patrick's Day. I thought it would be a wonderful idea since although I am Irish American, she is from Ireland. She is definitely the perfect gal for me and l love her to death. Her parents, although they are nice to me, since she is very close to them, they sometimes go a little far with giving us advice. I think now that we will soon be married, her parents need to take a step back, and let us make all of our decisions. My girl is uncomfortable with asking them to do that. Here's the real problem. I bought the ring, picked out the restaurant, her favorite of course, made all the plans with the restaurant on St. Patrick's Day. I thought of everything. Until I asked her father for permission to marry his daughter. He did say yes, but then when her Mother heard my plans, she became insistent that I had chosen the wrong day to do this. In her mind, the restaurant will be too busy and won't be quiet enough for us and literally told me I need to change the day. Now MTN, I'm a pretty easy going guy, but when it comes to this, I have it covered. I think it should be my decision, not her mom's how I plan on proposing to her daughter. I told her mom I was sorry she felt like that, but the plans are already made and I'm not going to change them. Since then the Mother has acted very differently to me. Even my girl noticed a change and asked me if I did anything to upset her mom. Should I give in and keep the peace, or stick to my original plan? Dear Edward, Her Mother has no right to interfere in this day. It is your day with your finance, not hers. I love your idea and find it to be very romantic. I'm sure your girlfriend will love it herself. You need to stick to your guns, because if you start giving in now, the Mother will only continue to put her two sense in with everything in your lives. You will soon be a team. You can't have a Mother in law, as well meaning as she is, changing your decisions because she feels she knows best. It's best to stop it now, before it ruins the rest of your life with your girl. Good Luck, and I'll be thinking of you on St. Patty's Day! -MTN Dear MTN, I've been dating Peter for 9 months now. He has a great job, comes from a great family, and is very handsome. I am also successful, have a great job (making about $20,000 more than him-but I don't care), and I've been told I'm very attractive. Even though we both say we love each other, the topic of marriage never has come up yet. Which is fine with me. I think I am having second doubts. What worries me is that he stills lives home with his parents and he's 44 years old. Although it was difficult for me to save, I was able to save for a house and last year I bought a beautiful home on Long Island. If we get married, does he just assume he is going to move out from Mom and Dad and move in with me? I really think he should be on his own. Not necessarily buy a house, but at the very least, get an apartment. I really have to say I question what he does with his money. I don't know how to bring this up to him, or if I should just be happy I found a nice guy and keep my mouth shut. My friends have mixed reviews on this subject. What do you think? -Nancy Dear Nancy, I wish I could say this is nothing important in the grand scheme of things and don't sweat the small stuff...but in this case I see your point. If a man has a great job, and a good head on his shoulders, he should be out on his own. At 44, he probably should also be able to afford to buy a house if he is good with his money. But that's another red flag you brought up. What does he spend his money on? If you don't know after 9 months-you need to ask him that. That's an important question, and if you two are planning a future together, you need to be able to be honest and open to answering questions on the more personal side. The only time I think it's okay for a man to be at home with his parents, is if he's the only sibling and one or more of the parents are sick and need his help. This actually shows a very dedicated man who is actually giving up a lot of his life to help his parents and that is very admirable. But if those parents are healthy and he's just there living off them-it's time to move on....and fast! Life is too short to settle. There are plenty of financially stable men out there. You just have to find them. Remember the rule of thumb, try it on your own for six months, if it doesn't work out, COME TO ME! Please email your questions to MTN to [email protected]. For more information on Maureen Tara Nelson, Private Matchmaking, Inc. check out her website at Mtnmatchmaking.com. Maureen shows photos to her clients, gives them monthly parties to attend free of charge and gives them complimentary dating coaching. For your free consultation, call 1-888-31-MATCH.