Dear MTN, I recently went on 4 dates with a really nice man. He is very classy, intelligent and sophisticated. He has a great job as a VP of a very well known company. He is very cultured and knows about literature and all kinds of things. I am a nurse and I grew up in upstate New York. I don't know a lot about fancy food or literature, I mean I'm smart but not that smart. He seems like a great guy and I think I can learn a lot from him. I am worried I will fall deeply in love with him and he will not like me. I'm worried he will want a New York City girl, you know a classy beautiful type. Maybe I am selling myself short but in your experience do men usually care about their lady's job? Sincerely, Nurse Country Bumpkin Dear Nurse Bumpkin, There are 2 things you need to know, first of all you have to feel comfortable being yourself on a date, and second, a man usually doesn't care about a woman's career path. Many of my men want a woman exactly like you! They want someone who is caring, nurturing, giving, and loving. They want a woman that will love them for them, not their money. And you deserve the same respect! You say that you have been on 4 dates with him, that's great! I tell all of my clients to give someone at least 5 dates before they see the compatibility that I see when matching them up. If by the 5th date you do not feel comfortable being yourself, then you need to move on. I'm sure he is a great guy but you need to be true to yourself! Mainly the answer to your question is NO, most guys don't care about how much money a woman makes, as long as they are caring, nurturing and loving, like I'm sure you are!!! Dear MTN, There is a woman in my office building that I have a big crush on. I feel like a teenager again, every time I see her in the hall or kitchen I fumble over myself. I try to say hi or make small talk and she is nice but doesn't bring the conversation too far. She seems a little younger than me, this might be her first job. I don't want to make her uncomfortable but I really want to ask her out. We don't work together really, we just share office space. Sometimes we have office events and I was thinking I would wait until I saw her there but I don't know when the next one will be. I really want to get to know her better as soon as possible, what should I do? From, James Dear James, You have to respect your crushes feelings if you think this will embarrass her at work. I understand you're excited but saying something in the wrong situation may get you an answer you don't want. She may say no to a date only because she is embarrassed or nervous around her colleagues. Obviously an office romance is not ideal, but the heart wants what the heart wants, and it doesn't know when you are in an office or a grocery store! Not every love story starts with the ideal situation. Sometimes the love of your life may live an hour away, or they may make less (or more) money than you were anticipating. The bottom line is that if you are committed to finding love you will do whatever it takes! My advice to you is to wait until there is an out of the office event where you can get to know her without making her feel uncomfortable. It is important to show her this respect because you already know that she may have reservations about you because of the office situation. Getting to know her at the event will make her feel more comfortable and you she will give you a real chance!! Good luck!! Dear MTN, My husband and I are thinking of getting a divorce. We have been in a marriage that hasn't been working for a few months now. I am not scared to let go of our marriage, I feel ready to move on. The problem is we share a business. We own a small jewelry business together and we have worked side by side for a long time now. I am unsure of whether we should remain business partners, one of us sell, or sell the whole thing. I can't see myself being comfortable with continuing to work next to him, I think it would make it very difficult for me to move on. I don't know if he feels the same, I think we have avoided talking about it because then it would make our divorce feel too final. We have always worked well together in the sense of our business, it's just our home life that became very difficult. I'm very confused Maureen, please help me! Sincerely, Jan Dear Jan, I found something you said very important here. You said "I think we have avoided talking about it because then it would make our divorce feel too final." Jan, you are obvisously not ready to move on if you can say something like that. It sounds like your husband isn't either! If you think that you make excellent business partners then it has to be because you work well together. If you can solve the problems of owning a small business together then you should give your marriage every chance you can. Think about all the things you love about your husband and what you might be able to do to make it work. If you really think you have exhausted every option and divorce is imminent, then you have to talk together about what to do with the business. I agree it would be hard to move on having your ex as your business partner, but it's something you and your husband have to decide together. I would put your emotional needs ahead of your financial needs. If you really want a divorce but don't want to lose the business, do what you need to do for your peace of mind and heart. Maybe it is a blessing you have this business because it is making you think long and hard about your relationship. If you are willing to do whatever it takes to make your business survive then you should do the same for your marriage! Please send in your questions to [email protected]. Maureen Tara Nelson Private Matchmaking, Inc. 1-888-31-MATCH