Dear MTN, I really need help and I am very embarrassed that I have to write to you. My name is Bob, and I was planning on getting married with the loveliest gal in the world. She was from the same County in Ireland that I am from, as well as where your family is from - as you've mentioned before...County Mayo, Knock. We met here in NYC five years ago at a party through friends and never had one fight! This past year since we've been engaged she's been a little bit distant and distracted, but I chalked that up to all the planning it's taking for the upcoming wedding in THREE MONTHS! Last week I came home from work early to surprise her, and I was the one who really got the surprise. It was actually the shock of my life. I found her, Mary, in bed, our bed, with her best friend Tracy! I still can't talk about it to her. I just left all my things and I'm staying with my Mother. I just yelled at her as I was leaving, that the wedding was over. My Mother is fantastic and hasn't asked me any questions. She knows the wedding is off, and that I'll tell her the details when I can talk about it. My question to you is, who is responsible to tell all the people that the wedding is off? I can't even tell my buddies yet. I figure that since she made all the plans and that she was the one who broke our bond, that she should be in charge of letting the guests know. I'm I correct? Please say yes, since I don't have it in me to do that task. I can barely make it to work every day. Thank you so much. - Bob Dear Bob, I am so sorry to hear that terrible news. I can only imagine how difficult this is for you, and I wish I could say something to ease the pain you must be going through. You are right in your thinking that it is her responsibility to call off the wedding officially. Not yours! So just take a deep breath, relax, hopefully go to a therapist just to tell him what happened to you, and I promise, one day you will get over this. I hope this makes you feel better to know that this is very common lately for men to experience. Just realize it is better to have found out now, then after the wedding! You will be fine. I will say a prayer for you. - MTN Dear MTN, You have probably heard this a million times before, but I do need to talk to someone about this. I am a 30 year old, professional, attractive guy with a great job. I have been going out with the same beautiful girl for about seven years now. She is talking about getting married more and more each day. When she starts talking about it, I just quickly get off the subject as soon as I can. I am not sure if I am ready to get married. The day I marry someone, it will be forever, since I don't believe in divorces. In fact, no one in my family has ever been divorced. Although my girlfriend is everything I would ask for in a wife, I still have doubts about being with one person for the rest of my life. My question is, do you think I am crazy and just nervous, or do you agree that I am not ready for marriage, dispite how great my girlfriend is. Please print my letter. Thanks. - Ty Dear Ty, If she was the right one for you, you woudn't be having these doubts. In fact, you would be so afraid that some other guy would come by and snatch her up, that you would want to marry her immediately. For whatever reason, she just isn't the right one for you. For a relationship to last, you must have both compatibility and chemistry. You might just have the chemistry part. When you find the right girl that you have both with, you won't need to ask my advice. Best of luck to you in your search. - MTN Please send in your questions to [email protected]. Maureen Tara Nelson Private Matchmaking, Inc. 1-888-31-MATCH